as if the affect
had been removed...
the adults created a 'gap' -
their very own 'untrustworthiness'
that we boys summarized as a 'false person'
these 'supervisory adults' teachers, managers et al
were 'ahead of us' with their behaviours
we boys had no secrets
that's why we could 'measure' behaviour
their 'perversions' were not articulated in language,
of course not, because they were 'inside a process of hiding'
a show of 'playing inspector' or cop or NAZI 'giving orders' to boys
or
to put it this way:
they themselves interfered with themselves
their behaviour gave them away as 'untrustworthy'
a genuine behaviour never 'masks' or 'performs'
boys had opinions on religion -
fathers or mothers came and 'liberated' their boys